Understanding Fear: It’s Not Just in Your Head
If you’ve ever been told to “just stop being afraid,” you know that fear isn’t something you can think your way out of. Fear isn’t just a mindset—it’s a full-body experience rooted in your nervous system and past experiences.
Whether you’re dealing with chronic anxiety, fear of speaking up, or deep-seated trauma responses, the key to removing fear isn’t to suppress it—but to work with your body to release it safely.
In this post, we’ll explore why fear gets stuck, how it manifests in both the mind and body, and what you can do to regulate your nervous system and reclaim a sense of safety.
Why Does Fear Get Stuck in the Body?
Fear isn’t just a thought—it’s a physiological response designed to keep you safe. Your nervous system is constantly scanning for danger, and when it perceives a threat, it activates fight, flight, freeze, or fawn.
The Four Fear Responses and How They Show Up In The Nervous System
- Fight: You feel anger, tension, or the need to defend yourself. Your body holds fear as tight shoulders, jaw clenching, or digestive issues.
- Flight: You feel restless, anxious, or avoidant. Fear manifests as racing thoughts, shallow breathing, or constant overworking.
- Freeze: You feel stuck, numb, or dissociated. Fear shows up as brain fog, heaviness, or feeling disconnected from your body.
- Fawn: You people-please or over-accommodate to avoid conflict. Fear is stored as chronic tension, fatigue, and self-abandonment.
When fear isn’t processed, it stays trapped in your body, leading to long-term nervous system dysregulation. The key to releasing it? Helping your body feel safe again.
How to Remove Fear from the Mind and Body
Step 1: Regulate Your Nervous System
Before trying to “think your way” out of fear, start with body-based practices to signal safety to your nervous system.
Grounding Exercises: Press your feet into the floor and notice the sensation. Feel the weight of your body supported. Vagus Nerve Stimulation: Try humming, gargling, or deep sighing to activate the parasympathetic nervous system. Orienting: Slowly look around the room and name five things you see. This tells your nervous system, “I am here, I am safe.”
Step 2: Reframe Fear in the Mind
Once your body feels safer, you can begin shifting fear-based thoughts.
Name the Fear: Say out loud, “I notice fear in my body, but I am not the fear.” Reframe the Story: Instead of “I’m not safe,” try “I am learning how to feel safe in my body.” Use Curiosity Instead of Judgment: Instead of pushing fear away, ask: “What is this fear trying to protect me from?”
* Please note: if you are living in an un-safe space, with un-safe people, please reach out locally for support.
Step 3: Move Fear Through the Body
Fear is energy, and it needs movement to be released.
Shake it Out: Stand up and gently shake your arms, legs, and shoulders for 30 seconds. This helps release trapped adrenaline. Breathwork for Fear Release: Try box breathing (inhale 4 sec, hold 4 sec, exhale 4 sec, hold 4 sec) to calm your system. Express it Creatively: Sing, dance, journal—give the fear a way to move out of your body.
Step 4: Create a Sense of Safety Daily
Fear thrives in uncertainty. To rewire your system for safety, create daily rituals that reinforce calm.
Morning Check-In: Ask, “What does my body need to feel safe today?” Safe Touch: Place your hand on your chest and take a slow breath. Set Small Boundaries: Teach your nervous system that you are in control.
Final Thoughts: You Are Not Broken, You Are Protecting Yourself
Fear isn’t a flaw—it’s a sign that your nervous system is trying to protect you. Instead of pushing fear away, learn to work with your body to create safety from the inside out.
Healing isn’t about never feeling fear again—it’s about learning how to move through it with trust, resilience, and self-compassion.
If this resonated with you, what’s one practice from this list that you’re going to try today? Let me know in the comments!
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