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Finding  Your Voice

Does stepping into the spotlight make your heart race? Do you find yourself shrinking back when all eyes are on you? If so, you’re not alone. Many leaders, entrepreneurs, and creatives struggle with being seen and heard. But the truth is, your message, your work, and your presence deserve to take up space.

Becoming comfortable in the spotlight isn’t about changing who you are – it’s about building the confidence to show up fully as yourself. In this post, we’ll break down the mindset shifts, practical strategies, and nervous system techniques that can help you own your visibility without fear.


Why the Spotlight Feels Uncomfortable

Before we dive into solutions, let’s explore why being in the spotlight can feel so uncomfortable:

1. Fear of Judgment

The more visible you are, the more exposed you feel. Many people worry about what others will think, how they’ll be perceived, or whether they’ll make a mistake.

2. Conditioning to Stay Small

If you’ve been taught to be humble, polite, or accommodating, stepping into visibility can feel unnatural. You may have internalized the belief that taking up space is selfish or unsafe.

3. Nervous System Overload

For some, visibility triggers a fight, flight, or freeze response. Your body might interpret attention as a threat, causing physical symptoms like shaky hands, shortness of breath, or a racing heart.

4. Perfectionism and Overthinking

The pressure to be flawless can make you second-guess everything you say and do, keeping you from showing up authentically.


How to Get Comfortable in the Spotlight

Now that we’ve identified the roadblocks, let’s explore how to overcome them and step into the spotlight with confidence.

1. Shift Your Mindset: The Spotlight Isn’t About You

One of the most powerful mindset shifts you can make is realizing that the spotlight isn’t about you—it’s about the impact of your message. Instead of focusing on how you’re being perceived, focus on who you’re serving. Ask yourself:

  • How can I help or inspire my audience?
  • What message do I want to share?
  • How can I show up in a way that feels aligned with my values?

2. Regulate Your Nervous System Before You Step Up

If visibility makes you feel unsafe, your body needs reassurance. Try these grounding techniques:

  • Deep breathing (inhale for four counts, exhale for six)
  • Progressive muscle relaxation (tense and release different muscle groups)
  • Power poses (stand tall with open posture to boost confidence)
  • Vocal warm-ups (humming or deep-throated sounds to relax your voice)

3. Practice Small Before Going Big

Confidence is built through repetition. If the idea of a big stage or camera feels overwhelming, start small:

  • Share a thought in a team meeting.
  • Post a short video or voice memo online.
  • Speak in a small group setting before tackling a larger audience.

4. Reframe the Fear: It’s Just Energy

That jittery feeling before you speak? It’s not fear—it’s activation. Instead of labeling it as anxiety, reframe it as excitement. Remind yourself: This energy is here to help me perform at my best.

5. Develop a Visibility Ritual

Create a personal ritual to get into the right mindset before stepping into the spotlight. This could include:

  • A short mantra like “I am meant to be here.”
  • A song that pumps you up.
  • A few deep breaths and a strong posture check.

6. Own Your Space (Physically and Verbally)

When you step into the spotlight, your body language speaks volumes. Use these techniques to exude confidence:

  • Plant your feet firmly instead of shifting nervously.
  • Use open gestures to engage your audience.
  • Speak at a steady pace rather than rushing through your words.
  • Make eye contact to establish connection and authority.

7. Detach from Perfection

Perfection is the enemy of presence. No one expects you to be flawless—they expect you to be real. Instead of trying to deliver the “perfect” performance, aim to be authentic, engaging, and connected.

8. Reflect and Celebrate Progress

After every moment in the spotlight, take a moment to reflect:

  • What went well?
  • What felt uncomfortable but worth it?
  • How can I make the next experience even better?

Celebrate every win, no matter how small. Growth happens one step at a time.


Final Thoughts: The Spotlight Is a Skill, Not a Personality Trait

Feeling comfortable in the spotlight isn’t reserved for a select few—it’s a skill that anyone can build. With the right mindset, practice, and tools, you can step into visibility with confidence, clarity, and ease.

Remember: You don’t need to change who you are to shine. You just need to allow yourself to take up space, trust your voice, and own your presence. The world is waiting to hear what you have to say.


— If you’ve ever struggled to speak up, felt your voice shake in high-stakes moments, or questioned if your words truly mattered, this practice is for you! — 

Click HERE for immediate access to the FREE “Find Your Voice” Guided Audio Training.

Take 11 minutes to activate the power of your voice with this guided practice. Includes: Grounding, breath-work and voice-work exercises to help you regulate your nervous system and build a confident voice. 


Hi, I’m Elise Besler! I’m a Somatic Voice Coach specializing in helping women leaders, creatives, and visionaries find their authentic voice, build secure relationships, and set boundaries with confidence. If past experiences have made you feel like you couldn’t have these things, I’m here to show you that you can.

Through a blend of somatic voice coaching, nervous system wisdom, embodied confidence, and powerful communication strategies, I’ll help you show up fully—both in your life and your work. Ready to be heard—fully and unapologetically? Let’s connect. 💌 hello@elisebesler.com

How to Get Comfortable Being in the Spotlight

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